GWARRRR!!!
Q: We are here in Santa Cruz at The Catalyst Club. It is November 5, 2012. Dave Brockie has been kind enough to grant me another interview . . .
A: . . . Oderus [Urungus] has decided to let me come out of my pen for a little while. We were [previously in] one [for the November 24, 2009 interview]. Now we are in another one. A series of cells they keep me in all the time. Working me to death that bastard!
Q: For this interview I thought we should give the fans a retrospective of the band going through each record starting with the present and working our way back.
A: Okay. You realize my memory will get fuzzier and wuzzier as we go along.
Q: So we will use most of your energy on the present. As your brain cells get depleted we will go backwards.
A: Sometimes the opposite happens. Listening to the sound of my own voice droning on and on actually gets me more fired up. Nothing can be finer.
Q: What stands out for you in terms of the band’s history with the release of Bloody Pit of Horror (2011)?
A: Slap dash rush job. Absolutely unbelievable that we created that record as quickly as we did. Cory [Smoot, late former guitarist] already had a whole album basically written for his side project in which he was going to get Randy [Blythe, vocalist] from Lamb of God and me to do vocals on. Cory had this whole f**kin’ side project record. All the music was recorded. He was just waiting for me. He wanted to call it Religion is Fiction. Cory wanted me to write all the lyrics. Cory said, “I want it to be called Religion is Fiction.” I asked him, “Do you have any other ideas?” Cory responded, “Nope. I got all the music.” I said, “All right. I can roll with that.” I think a lot of religion is fiction. It is certainly a provocative statement. I was ready to rip with it. When Cory played it for me, I said, “This is the best sh*t you’ve written! It’s so long it’s got to be a Gwar record!” Coincidentally, we were approaching the end of the two year 25th anniversary. We wanted to release an album at the beginning and end of the anniversary. We were running out of time. We needed something soon. So Cory said, “Hell yeah!” We just took Cory’s album, learned his songs, and recorded it in a whirlwind. I remember writing songs while we were in the car on the way to the studio. I did most of those songs without ever playing them live with the band, which is a total a** backwards way of making music. But it worked! It is our heaviest, densest album, definitely one of our darker works. It will always be one of my personal favorites. Unfortunately it will also be the last record Cory will be on because he passed away last year [on November 3, 2012 from a heart attack caused by a pre existing coronary heart disease]. Bloody Pit of Horror was a hell of a statement for Cory, and the music may live again because you can hear snippets of the music in the Cory Smoot Experiment solo record. Randy Blythe [Lamb of God vocalist] and I still talk about finishing the project as Cory wanted us to. So Cory’s music could be reborn again. Hell it’s only metal! Just dress it up a little different. The songs do sound different. They have different musicians playing on them along with Cory’s original guitar tracks and new vocal arrangements. It’s weird because by the end of the day Cory’s album could be three different albums.
Q: Pustulus Maximus has replaced Flattus Maximus [Cory Smoot’s Gwar character].
A: Yes. Cory had placed such a stamp on playing Flattus [Maximus] that we decided to retire the character. Flattus had been around forever. Gwar had several other musicians performing as Flattus before Cory [Dewey Rowell, Pete Lee, Tim Harriss, Zach Blair, Brian Fechino]. But Flattus was undeniably Cory’s baby. We had no desire to put someone else in the Flattus costume. We went to a four-piece following Cory’s death [on November 3, 2011] and finished our tour. We finished what we felt we needed to do for the band and moved on by beginning the process of finding a new guitar player.
Q: Who plays the Pustulus Maximus character.
A: Brent Purgason, a Richmond, Virginia native. Brent has played in a lot of bands more well known on the East Coast, including Cannabis, not Cannibal, Corpse. They are kind of like Cannibal Corpse, but all their songs are about smoking weed. They are fairly popular. Brent is really a funny guy, and he is f**kin’ metal as f**k! He plays all of Cory’s guitar parts note for note, but in his own way, which is what I was looking for. I told guitarists that came to the audition, “You have to play Cory’s parts note for note.” That is pretty much what they all tried to do. Many of them failed to do even that. But that was really not what I was looking for. It was a trick! I was looking for someone that could play Cory’s parts note for note but also take it a step further. Honestly that is what Brent did. Brent wrote a few flourishes, runs, and extra parts, which is why he got the job.
Q: Lust in Space (2009).
A: Lust in Space was a bit of a muddle. I love the way Lust in Space sounds and the packaging, which looks beautiful. I just think the story is a little confusing. We tried to tell the story of Bozo Destructo bearing an alien baby to come to Earth and somehow save the Universe from Cardinal Sin. Bozo is trying to create a vaccine using the baby who will escape from outer space and create the perfect life form. Sawborg [Destructo] does not want that. The Destructos do not want that. So they try to escape to Earth where they want to hide the baby. As the Destructos’ spaceship enters the Earth’s atmosphere it is shot down by a Cardinal Sin warship. Gwar winds up with the baby. I don’t really know what happens after that. Gwar encounters a few weirdos. Sawborg crashes his spaceship, which Gwar fixes up. Gwar goes back to outer space to kill Cardinal Sin, which we ultimately do. But in the end Gwar is pissed off because we find that outer space has no crack! Goddam it! Gwar also misses heavy metal. We admit to ourselves that we kind of grew fond of all those apes we f**ked and all those human beings we created. We love their helpless adulation and how they easily die for us. Gwar also loves their crack cocaine. So we came back to Earth. A lot of time was spent figuring out that plot.
Q: Sounds like it could have been a double record.
A: Maybe. The fact that we also made a 20 minute introduction video piece that went along with the show and made no sense whatsoever made it more confusing. But I was kind of cool with that though.
Q: Beyond Hell (2006).
A: Beyond Hell is great! What stands out about that album is we worked with Devin Townsend [producer]. Beyond Hell was another concept album that detailed Gwar’s decent into hell, including the guardians of different levels of hell we fought. Beyond Hell was Gwar’s take on hell. It was our Dante’s Inferno [first part of Dante Alighieri’s 14th century epic poem, Divine Comedy focusing on Alighieri’s journey through hell]. It is a very heavy record. Devin [Townsend] really got the concept of the record well, and he worked me really f**kin’ hard as a vocalist. Beyond Hell is a standout record.
Q: Beyond Hell was preceded by Live from Mt. Fuji (2005).
A: Live from Mt. Fuji is a fake record! It was actually recorded in Pittsburgh, [Pennsylvania]. People were so confused. We actually listed the date it was recorded as a date in the future! But people still asked, “How did you guys do that?!” (inebriated mock tone) Oh my god! People f**kin’ sometimes actually ask me if Gwar is from Antarctica dude! They ask, “What’s it like down there man?! Is there a scene?” (inebriated mock tone) I respond by saying, “Yeah, just some penguins, Norwegian researchers. It’s pretty cool.” Their response, “Really?!” (inebriated mock tone) It was recorded in Pittsburgh, [Pennsylvania] with samples of the crowd noise, including the Japanese shrieking, from Cheap Trick’s Cheap Trick at Budokan [1978 live record]. We figured we were never going to play in f**kin’ Japan so we might as well make a fake record about it!
Q: I’m surprised Gwar is not more popular in Japan.
A: It just costs so much f**kin’ money to get the s**t [stage gear and costumes] to Japan. Gwar does not sell millions of records. We are still very much underground kings . . . or more like slobs . . . or princes. I don’t know. We don’t want all that money. (laughter) All that money is for rich people. We like playing the underdog. We wouldn’t mind playing with some money just to see what it is like. But we can’t comprise what is most precious to us, that we actually have our self respect as artists, which is an unbelievable thing to have.
Q: Somewhat like Slayer, a band that continues to have a loyal fan base.
A: Yeah, exactly. You’ve also got Motorhead. I am so lucky because once you get to that level you do not have to defend it.
Q: Also look at what happened to Kiss. They maintained a loyal fan base even during the period when they released sub par records such as Asylum (1985) and Crazy Nights (1987). The fans did not care and continued to buy those records.
A: Oh yeah. I know! After the third reunion tour I got a little pissed. Also, they seemed to be so shameless about how they put different people in the costumes [referring to current Kiss guitarist Tommy Thayer adopting original Kiss guitarist Ace Frehley’s spaceman character and current Kiss drummer Eric Singer adopting original Kiss drummer Peter Criss’ catman character]. The characters in Gwar are really important. Gwar has to have people play them the right way. [In contrast] Kiss would throw anyone in [to play the Kiss characters].
Q: War Party (2004).
A: War Party was the album where Cory Smoot [late former guitarist] and Todd Evans [former bassist] stepped up and distinguished themselves as songwriting geniuses. War Party also marks Gwar’s departure from Metal Blade records and the first record on DRT Records. Starting with Violence Has Arrived (2001) Gwar sought to redefine itself as a more pure metal band, something we underlined with War Party in a big way. Initially, DRT [Records] had a lot of money and connections. DRT managed to get clearance [from the City of New York] for Gwar to shoot a video in the middle of Times Square, which is pretty f**kin’ awesome! Gwar shot the War Party video in Times Square. About halfway through Beyond Hell (2006) DRT [Records] just fell apart and folded. The label’s fancy Manhattan offices became a single room in Harlem and then out of the guy’s [owner of DRT Records] New Jersey house. The [office] steps shrank from 30 to one. We ended up in New York City court with the guy [owner of DRT Records], which was actually good because we got back all the rights to Violence Has Arrived and War Party that we now own free and clear.
Q: Violence Has Arrived (2001).
A: Violence Has Arrived is a great record! That is the album where Gwar decided it had gone on long enough. We were sick of writing funny punk songs that were totally reflective of my obsessed crude sense of humor. I had gotten shoved into the songwriter role because we did not have guys [in Gwar] that could write good metal licks. As result, Gwar was becoming a funny, punk, comedy band where most of the songs were parodies of other differing types of music and s**t, which was kind of weird and a little cool. But it was not, in my mind, really Gwar. A lot of Gwar fans love the albums before Violence Has Arrived. With Violence Has Arrived Gwar decided to get away from that. We have done that to death. We can still play some of those songs live. But with Violence Has Arrived we decided to replace the old, kind of goofy Gwar with a new slimmed down, meaner more evil Gwar. We got this really awesome artist [Adrian Smith], not that our other artists weren’t awesome, to paint a really sick album cover for us, which looks f**kin’ great. The line up had solidified enough that Gwar had really good musicians in all stations. We went after it! The album turned out really great. It is one of my favorite Gwar albums to this day. Very heavy, very dark, sick, slightly political lyrical themes that are hopeless and bleak. Violence Has Arrived is basically Oderus [Urungus’] death poetry. Violence Has Arrived is definitely one of my favorite records. It is like Dungeons & Dragons [fantasy, role-playing game originally designed by Gary Gygax and Dave Arneson] on bad acid.
Q: How about the live record, You’re All Worthless and Weak (2000).
A: Gwar did not have much to do with it. It was pretty much cobbled together by a renegade merchandise department of the time. It was put together as a mail order project that Gwar did not know much about. Gwar did not have any control over that. I would not consider that an official Gwar project, more a bootleg. But it’s still cool. I don’t even know what’s on it. I don’t even think I’ve ever really listened to it. Is it a live album? What the hell is it? It’s a total bootleg. I’ve never even listened to it.
Q: We Kill Everything (1999).
A: By the time of We Kill Everything Gwar had gone through a lot of line up changes. We lost Pete [Lee, former guitarist]. We hadn’t yet found Zach [Blair, former guitarist]. Cory [Smoot, late former guitarist] was still a couple of years in the future. Basically, Mike Derks [current guitarist], Brad [Roberts, current drummer], and I were doing a side project band called DBX, Dave Brockie Experience, which is a funny, punk band with three-chord songs with ridiculous lyrics. I played bass and sang. No costumes or anything. It was just a funny little punk band. No big deal. It was really hard to change gears to writing epic metal songs. So we didn’t. Gwar albums began to sound like DBX albums, which is kind of what We Kill Everything is about, real simple, funny songs, but not something you would necessarily listen to more than once. It was almost like novelty rock. We Kill Everything is probably my least favorite Gwar record, but it still makes me laugh.
Q: Carnival of Chaos (1997).
A: Carnival of Chaos is a sprawling epic! That album clocks in at about 88 minutes long. We just went the f**k off on that album. We had a really strong line up, but we didn’t feel any agenda to be any type of band other than what we felt Gwar should sound like at the time. We were so all over the place, and we were doing a lot of drugs during that record. We had a band member who had a drug problem who got us all f**ked up on speed. We f**kin’ did that album over a three month period, and none of us slept for weeks. We thought it was the coolest thing in the world as we went out of our minds. Gwar is from the East Coast. We don’t have speed on the East Coast. It’s a West Coast, Midwest, and Texas thing. You hear about it all the time. You see it on the biker shows. I guess people do it on the East Coast. It’s just not as prevalent on the East Coast. Speed just blew our minds. It blew my mind! I said [to myself, “You mean I can stay up for three days straight and just work in the studio and play music! This is great!” After the third day it was like (flatulence sound). Carnival of Chaos is brilliant in that it is a total tweaker’s album because we went after every single little thing and took it apart, looked at it with a microscope, and put it back together. We did the most bizarre odd things. We had songs that would stop, but they wouldn’t be cut on the compact disc so you would go to the next song and there would be 11 minutes of silence and then another song would start. F**ked up s**t like that. We thought, “One of these days that mother f**ker [listener] is going to leave that thing [stereo] on and he’s going to realize there is a song there and it’s going to freak him out!” (laughter) The songwriting is all over the place. Carnival of Chaos is not my favorite album, but it is certainly reflects our songwriting chops. That album is a lot more like Frank Zappa and The Beatles than Black Sabbath or Sex Pistols.
Q: It was Gwar’s version of Sgt. Pepper’s Loneley Hearts Club Band [The Beatles’ 1967 conceptual record].
A: I think so, a really good analogy.
Q: Ragnarok (1995).
A: Ooh! Ragnarok is one of my personal favorites because it was the first time where we made a fake newspaper with the packaging and really explored the s**t out of the Ragnarok theme [a series of future events in Norse mythology, including a great battle foretold to ultimately result in the death of a number of major figures, the occurrence of various natural disasters, and the subsequent submersion of the world in water]. We wrote fake news articles. It was an apocalypse record about a big comet that was going to hit the Earth. Ragnarok was tied in with the beginning of the new millennium. The idea with Ragnarok was that the end of the millennium was going to come in a little while. Gwar was going to get the jump on the end of the millennium by claiming everyone had gotten it wrong because the world was actually going to end in 1995 [not 2000]. We just went off on that record and had a lot of fun. But musically Ragnarok did not sound as good as we wanted it to. We brought a big remote truck into the Slave Pit [Gwar’s Richmond, Virginia-based studio]. It was a huge truck that looked like a normal 18 wheel truck. But the interior of the cargo cab served as the control suite for the recording studio. We ran cables into the Slave Pit and we created recording spaces [in the cargo cab] using portable baffling [wall/screen to deflect sound] and used the actual acoustics of the [cargo cab’s] room. We were told it was going to be awesome. For some reason the sound just didn’t cut it for me. Even though the songwriting and packaging are great. It was also the time period CDs were taking over LPs. The cover art was designed to be on a LP, and then they told us, “It was only going to go out on a format this big.” (hand gesture reflecting small CD size) I was like, “Aaahhh!” I spent forever on this super-obsessive photoshopped illustration of Gwar playing the last Ragnarok concert and it got blown down to that big (hand gesture reflecting small size). Oh my god it was so sad.
Q: Was Ragnarok ever released on vinyl?
A: Never came out on vinyl. But Ragnarok is a fun record. There are a lot of good songs on it. Whargoul is on there, which is one of my personal favorite songs.
Q: America Must be Destroyed (1992) (I apologize as I overlooked This Toilet Earth (1994).
A: America Must be Destroyed is probably my all time favorite Gwar album. The first thing anyone is ever going to see about an album is its cover art. America Must be Destroyed was primarily coming out as vinyl. When we first started working on America Must be Destroyed we were pretty sure we weren’t going to release it in CD [format] because CDs were still a weird new thing that weren’t exploding, and we weren’t really sure it was going to happen. We had this guy do a crazy collage for us, and we absolutely hated it. So poor Hunter [Jackson, band co founder] had to try to put together all the cover art overnight. Meanwhile we had written a really great, strong album that sounded great and had heavy songs. But the title America Must be Destroyed really pissed off a lot of people in Gwar’s organization. The art department and band got alienated from one another over the title. The art department did not want to call the album America Must be Destroyed because they thought it is a dumb title. The band had to defend the title and explain the title. We are not trying to say the country needs to be destroyed, only certain institutions. America Must be Destroyed is not meant as an anti American statement as in killing Americans, but more that the evil aspects of America must be destroyed. America must walk the talk that it gives. America is always putting itself out there as having the greatest government, the land of the free, and home of the brave. Well then America needs to f**kin’ act like that wherever it goes. You just can’t lie about it.
Q: I think I saw that description in the footnote on the album liner notes? It was about this long (hand gesture reflecting large amount of text)
A: Hah! (laughter) Really, there was a footnote?! That is hilarious! (laughter) We were recording America Must be Destroyed at full speed chugging right along. All of a sudden I had to go back to Richmond, [Virginia] and explain the record to Gwar’s art department. But man we worked so hard, especially on the title track, America Must be Destroyed. The sound collage we created by using everything from Dr. Strangelove [**], the Oliver North [**] hearings, Dr. [Martin Luther] King, Jr. [**], [Adolf] Hitler [**], all these figures. We formed all [these figures’] words together into this long narrative that ends the song [America Must be Destroyed]. The final thing you hear is the space shuttle blowing up, [and] you hear this weird voice saying, “Contingency procedures are in effect.” (robotic mock tone) I still get chills when I hear that song. We played it at The Palladium in L.A., [California] and went back to the hotel that night, turned on the radio and that song was on the radio. That is when it hit me and I said, “Wow! We are f**kin’ doing something!” That was like album three or four and I said to myself, Gwar is definitely not some underground joke act. We are touching people’s lives in a big way.
Q: The Road Behind (1992, E.P.)
A: The Road Behind actually came out after America Must be Destroyed. That was the first C.D. Gwar ever put out. It was an experiment to see if C.D.s would work or not. It has The Road Behind and a couple of live tracks that are really, really funny, including a track recorded in Canada from a show where the crowd is trying to fight us the whole show. You can hear fists pummeling people’s faces while I am saying, “I know a lot of your friends are getting beaten up right now and you’re not cool with it.” (laughter) It was horrible dude. (laughter) It’s f**kin’ great! I love that record! Oh my god! They’re all French Canadians and couldn’t understand a word I was f**kin’ saying . . . or so they say! They’re full of s**t. They understand every word. They just pretend. Of course they understand! They’re so snotty. I love people’s cultures but don’t be so proud of your culture to the point where it’s obnoxious to other f**kin’ people. I mean I don’t go running around saying, “I’m from the East Coast, Richmond, Virginia mother f**ker! It’s great there! N.A.S.C.A.R.!” (inebriated mock tone) I mean God. How horrible. I don’t have a lot to be proud about except there is a lot of great people in Richmond, [Virginia], which is why we stay there . . . and it’s cheap as f**k. There is no way we could do what we do unless we live in Richmond, [Virginia]. We couldn’t do it in San Francisco, [California]. I would love to be in a place where I am surrounded with interesting, amazing people all the time. But I wouldn’t be able to afford the studio space. I just couldn’t. Maybe one day. We’ll see. I always said Gwar is a band that would last forever. So we’ll see.
Q: You need to get in touch with Lars Ulrich [Metallica’s drummer] to hook you up with Metallica’s studio in San Rafael, [California].
A: We’ve pretty much f**ked up every cool contact we’ve had in the record industry by Oderus’ foul mouth, which is completely motivated by jealousy. I rag on every rock star. I just don’t even care any more. We played in the House of Blues in Hollywood, [California] last night where Steel Panther [glam heavy metal band from Los Angeles, California that parody the excesses of 1980’s heavy metal music] is huge. I said, “Steel Panther looks like a bunch of c**k sucking f**gots to me! (Oderus Urungus character tone) Oderus can get away with it. But that was not a cool thing to say in Hollywood. The whole audience was at first shouting, “Yeah! Yeah!” Then after Oderus’ comment the audience thought, “Huh?! Did he just say that?!” The soundman then hit the sample sound of crickets chirping. “Yeah! What do they [Steel Panther] do?! I mean they look like a bunch of chicks!” (Oderus Urungus character tone) I was joking around. I actually really like Steel Panther. They’re hilarious. Then I tweeted today, “I can’t believe people were so offended that I f**kin’ said Steel Panther look like a bunch of c**k sucking f**gots. Jeez people! Lighten up!” (Oderus Urungus character tone)
Q: I think Oderus is related to Kevin DuBrow. [late, original Quiet Riot vocalist]
A: Yeah! I’m related to everyone. I created the human race by f**king apes.
Q: Scumdogs of the Universe (1990)
A: Scumdogs of the Universe is Gwar’s quintessential breakthrough album. It is the album where Gwar goes from being a weird little art rock band to an actual, bona fide heavy metal band. Scumdogs of the Universe opened it all up for us. It is funny because we did that record with an English label that gave us a lot of money to do it. We wondered how the label was able to get so much money for a one-off deal, one record, get the money, deliver the record, do a tour, you’re done and then you can talk about the next record. What the record label had done is lied to all the distributors by saying they had secured a two-record deal. So the record label got all these advances from distributors, gave us our money, and then they moved to New Zealand! (laughter) I am serious. So we put out the record. All the distributors are selling, selling, and selling. We were wondering why our calls to the record label f**kin’ office in London were not getting returned. The record label had flown us over several times and we’re totally awesome cool great guys. I should have known when one of the record label executives was f**king my manager that something is not going good here. Our manager was great. She actually grew up in San Francisco. But generally you do not want the record label and your manager in bed with each other. So that was a warning sign. Next thing I knew I was getting calls from all over the world, such as Japan. Back in the old days you would get a fax. I remember the fax, which said, “Hey Gwar, we here in Japan think we make big sales and we will bring them!” (Japanese based broken English tone) It was this horrible f**ked up English. “So when we get second album we give big hurray!” (Japanese based broken English tone) I then had to tell them the record label lied to you. You are not getting another record and all that money you spent basically got stolen for you. I’ve always thought that is why Gwar never got to Japan. I thought at that point the Yakuza [Japanese members of transnational organized crime syndicates] was saying, “Gwar no good. They will never come here.” (Japanese based broken English tone) In otherwise something very inscrutably Asian went down. That sucked! So after Scumdogs of the Universe we found ourselves without a record label. But that is when we signed with Metal Blade Records who picked up Scumdogs of the Universe and Hell-O and went forward with America Must be Destroyed. We were with Metal Blade Records for many years and now we are back with Metal Blade.
Q: Hell-O (1988)
A: Hell-O was the first one, in 1988. In 1988 Gwar had been around for about three years. We had pretty much just played in Richmond, [Virginia] as a joke rock act. We would play three or four songs before my band, Death Piggy. We would basically would come out and stand on stage and let the guitars create feedback and go “Ughh!” (inebriated mock tone) I wasn’t even singing back then. I was just playing guitar, and I am a terrible guitar player. All I had was a skateboard helmet with glued spikes sticking out from the top. I had fake fur tied around me and football shoulder pads with some stupid spikes. The lead singer was named Johnny Slutman. We would also say horrible jokes. I would say, “Hey Johnny I heard you just got in from Cleveland, [Ohio].” Johnny would say, “Yeah!” Then I would again say, “Hey Johnny I heard you just got in from Cleveland, [Ohio].” Johnny would again say, “Yeah!” Then we would repeat it and it would take forever. The guitars are just generating feedback and making noise. I would say, “Johnny where did you just get in from?” Johnny would say, “Yeah!” That was what Gwar was. It was just horrible dude. Gradually we started getting some songs together. We would do these three horrible songs, leave, and then come on stage as Death Piggy ready to play. But everyone was gone because they loved Gwar and did not care about Death Piggy. Fans would tell us, “That Gwar thing you’re doing is hilarious!” Death Piggy was just a hardcore band. We had our little run for about three years. We did pretty well. We put out some singles. But people wanted to see Gwar. So we got over Death Piggy and started concentrating on Gwar. Once we realized we weren’t doing Death Piggy and just focused on Gwar and realized we may actually pack clubs and maybe make a little money. But we had to write enough songs for a whole set.
Once we got enough decent songs we said, “What the hell. Let’s try to get a record deal.” Just one record. That is all we were thinking about, to do one f**kin’ record. I did not send out demo. tapes. I sent out V.H.S. tapes of Gwar doing all sorts of f**ked up things. We would put our costumes on and bust into our local news channel where they would put us on television. We built a fake news set and would mock kill a newscaster. We did all this crazy s**t. The one day it snowed in Richmond we all said, “We got to put our costumes on!” We would run around in the snow. That V.H.S. got out there.
Rebby Sharpe, a musician friend from Richmond, Virginia told this weirdo in New York City named Mark Kramer who was running a little record label named Shimmy Disc, an art rock label, which is why Gwar had that art rock association, about this crazy band from Richmond, [Virginia]. One night I was laying in my humble apartment in Richmond, Virginia on South Pine Street, which used to be called Spine Street. None of us had f**kin’ jobs. One night I made soup out of mayonnaise. I just took four big globs of mayonnaise and put in some water and I was like, “Yeah dinner!” It was horrible. Mayonnaise soup is not a good idea. Everyone has got to go through the hungry years because it builds character. Our idea of a feast was Oodles of Noodles [dried precooked noodles] with a pot pie on top of it. It was the best! You would break up the Oodles of Noodles. It was nothing but sodium. It was wonderful. But it was so f**kin’ cheap. You could get Oodles of Noodles for 25 cents and a pot pie for 69 cents. That is like under a dollar and you are eating like a king.
I was asleep one night and had this crazy dream I was in New York City, and I had never been to New York in my life. I had sent Mark Kramer a V.H.S. tape. I guess my subconscious was thinking, “I wonder what is going to happen when this dude in New York looks at this V.H.S.?” The next morning I was woken up by the phone ringing. It was Mark Kramer who said, “Dude [you] gotta’ come up to New York and record your record.” I was like, “Hell f**kin’ yeah!” We ran up to New York and basically spent the craziest week of our lives there. We slept under the board in the live room and banged that f**kin’ record out in a week. We recorded with the damn door open in lower Manhattan and you could hear vehicles driving by and sirens in the background between f**kin’ songs. It is so f**kin’ ridiculous. Since Mark Kramer was an art rock guy the songs should have had a more punk rock, thrash metal sound. I’ve always wanted to do a version of Hell-O called Hell-O Again with a more thrash metal, punk rock Gwar production. But the songwriting is really good. That is where it all began!
Q: All right. We are the beginning and this is the end.
A: That was awesome!
Arash Moussavian, Entertainment Law Attorney
arashmoussavian@cal.berkeley.edu
www.moussavianlaw.com
www.linkedin.com/in/arashmoussavian
All photos taken by Arash Moussavian. This article and all photos are protected by copyright. Please contact me prior to use, or I will make shish kabab of your loins.
